How to Leave Behind Anger and Depression and Become Happier

THE TZADDIK RABBI OFER EREZ SHLIT”A IN A SPECIAL CLASS WHICH HE GAVE OVER TO THE KOLLEL OF SHUVU BANIM MIAMI.  RAV OFER EXPLAINS HOW THE TESTS OF THE FOREFATHERS WERE A POWERFUL LESSON FOR US FOR HOW TO ESCAPE FROM THE TRAITS OF ANGER AND DEPRESSION AND TO MERIT TO GREAT FAITH AND THE JOY OF LIFE.

These are his holy words:

“In Likutey Halachos Rabbi Noson writes that the work of self-sacrifice of Avraham and the rest of the forefathers wasn’t in the category of a test for them, because for the forefathers it was an obvious thing to sacrifice themselves for the Kadosh Baruch Hu.

“In the Midrash, they ask: if so, what were the tests of Avraham Avinu – it’s known that he was tested with ten tests?

“Rabbi Noson answers in Likutey Halachos that this is talking about completely different tests.  The Kadosh Baruch Hu puts the forefathers into situations which are not comprehensible to them.  They don’t understand the conduct of the Kadosh Baruch Hu, and in this they are tested – if they accept the conduct of the Kadosh Baruch Hu or are fed up with it.

“In Parashas Lech Lecha, the Kadosh Baruch Hu says to Avraham, 'Take yourself from your land, from your birthplace, and from your father’s house to the land which I will show you' (Breishis 12:1).  Avraham and Sarah were great Rebbes in Charan – 'and the souls which they made in Charan' (ibid. 5).  And suddenly Hashem asks them to leave everything at the age of 75 (in Avraham's case), and to go on a new path – this was self-sacrifice for Avraham.

“Afterwards, in the land of Israel, Hashem reveals himself several times to Avraham and promises to give the land to his descendants…  Avraham Avinu travels around the land and does many rectifications, and after three or four months, there is a famine in the land.  Avraham is forced to descend to Egypt, and the entire half-year that Sarah is by Pharaoh (according to the Chatam Sofer who brings the Rambam), Avraham doesn’t question anything about the Kadosh Baruch Hu.

“This is his test, because if Avraham Avinu felt a little bit of resentment about the behavior of the Kadosh Baruch Hu, he wouldn’t have stood up to this test.  Rabbi Noson says that the tests of the forefathers show us a phenomenal contradiction in His conduct.  From their standpoint, they need to nullify themselves to His conduct completely – there are no questions at all, because everything that Hashem does is for the best.

“Every Jew knows that everything that Hashem does is for the best.  Here, Rabbi Akiva said this in the Gemara (Brochos 60b), 'Everything that the Merciful One does – He does for the best.'  However, one needs to know that a person is made up of a mind (thoughts) and a heart (feelings), and the heart doesn’t always agree with the claims of the mind.

“All our lives we are working on returning to the heart the intellectual knowledge that everything that Hashem does is for the best.

“Rabbi Dessler says in ‘Michtav M’Eliyahu’ that all the time that a person is angry or upset this indicates the difference that he has between his intellectual knowledge and the feeling of his heart.  Because a person who is found in 100% faith doesn’t get angry or upset.  He knows that everything that Hashem does is for the best; then why get angry about the good of the Kadosh Baruch Hu?

“Because the deeper reason for all anger about anything in the world is really anger at the Kadosh Baruch Hu – we don’t agree with His conduct.  Rabbi Dessler says that we are embarrassed to go directly to the Kadosh Baruch Hu and to blame him if something doesn’t work for us.  Instead, we blame someone in this world – the wife, friends, children at home, the boss at work…

“In order to strengthen the feeling in the heart that everything that Hashem does is for the best, we need to say to ourselves during the tests which we go through: Really, it’s not nice.  The situation that I’m found in is hard for me, but I am strengthened with the knowledge that also this – everything – is for the best.

“One who takes on strengthening himself in the knowledge that everything that Hashem does is for the best, strengthens this trait within us.”